I have never liked Gareth Southgate, the former England football manager. My loathing started when he missed a vital penalty as a player during the 1996 European soccer championships and then proceeded to cash in on his mistake by making a pizza advertisement.
I think the worst kept secret in English soccer was confirmed this week when he was knighted in the New Year honours list. Arise Sir Gareth. But why give a man a knighthood who has won actually nothing? The long wait for a trophy for English football continues. What award will the manager get if England does win something? Will he or she become a Lord overnight and a privy councillor?
It is a sad state of affairs that England has not won a trophy since 1966, it is even sadder than a man who came close but not close enough is being honoured with one of the land’s top awards. Remember the headlines about Southgate during the European Championships last year? At one stage Fleet Street agreed that he was completely useless and even though he had one of the best squads at the tournament England were playing boring football and only reached the finals by the skin of their teeth.
I don’t think the most ardent England fan expected their team to beat Spain in the final and instead of joy there were tears. Southgate left only to be honoured a few months later. Sir, there must be some mistake, since when is failure being honoured? No prizes for second... only for Gareth!