I see that there has been a call for the police in Mallorca to crack-down (if that’s the proper word!) on tourists who insist upon wearing very little clothing when they are out and about. We are not talking of those who strip-off when lying on the beach, although personally I would like to see a little more modesty displayed by those who are less than ‘beach ready’ at any given time, especially when they hop about on one leg under a skimpy towel when getting changed to go home, endeavouring (and failing) to hide their bits-and-pieces from a mostly disinterested public.
Anyway, this leads me to another ‘given’ - this being, why is it that on properly designated nudist beaches you will rarely see anyone (of either sex) that you would actually like to see naked? However, what we are talking about here is the recent phenomenon that I have been reading about in my online Bulletin, whereby some people seem to like to walk about when shopping or going out for a meal wearing almost no clothing at all. Indeed, in one published photo a couple of young ladies appeared to be wandering around Palmanova (or some such resort) with nothing to hide their modesty save for a strategically positioned rucksack that almost covered their bums. So as not to put the blame for this type of (non) holiday wear on women - I find that men can be and often are a lot worse. At one time this sort of display of one’s manhood could be understandably blamed upon your average older German tourist who liked to stroll along the waters edge wearing only an ultra-mini pair of briefs - or as my slightly younger brother once observed - “He will have somebody’s eye out with that if he isn’t careful” but not anymore it seems.
Away from the beach, I like to think that people should dress during the long hot summer months with some sort of self-awareness - as in body shape and perhaps more critically age appropriateness. We all know that young women up to their late twenties could wear a black bin-bag and still look fabulous. After fifty? Less so! It’s the same with blokes; for instance, it is as if many of us had never heard of the term ‘middle-age-spread’ when insisting upon wearing an ultra tight T shirt over a pair of shorts that are slightly on the small side - to say the least. As I get older, I have to say that I get much more critical of those who insist upon sharing their bodies with all and sundry without ever being asked to do so. Indeed I think that the Balearic authorities should introduce a by-law actually banning inappropriate leisure-wear among tourists and not forgetting residents, who can be as bad sometimes.
Also into this category I would place open-toed sandals and crocs as worn by men of a certain age - followed by a complete ban on what I call - an aggressive display of breasts on any social occasion, thus making men like me feel really nervous. In fact dear reader - for most of us whilst holidaying or just spending a day at your local beach - more is much-much better than less. Hey, come on, you know it makes sense.